Zell's Mistake
by Avion Jade
Summary: Zell mishandles revenge against Seifer when he is allowed back into the Garden. Post Game Funny.


Just a short fic here, that my friend and I were talking about. It's based on a picture that my friend Queen000 has on her MSM messenger. My friend and I are planning a second and third Chapter for this story. Review and tell me what you think.

I don't own Final Fantasy 8 or the picture this story is based on.

For those waiting for my other stories...They'll be updated today or tomorrow. Promise.

If you're looking closely, you'll see a reference to another one of my humour stories. It's named 'Squall and Rinoa's Second Official Date' and it's probably favourite piece of writing.

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Why Seifer was allowed back into Garden, Zell did not know. He just figured that the world had gone crazy, maybe over the sudden lack of good hotdogs and maybe…just maybe…the sorceress war had something to do with everyone's apparent lack of sanity. 

Maybe as the world stopped celebrating its victories and mourning its losses, Hyne had decided that one of 'Garden's heroes' needed a shake up. Maybe Zell had been celebrating a bit too hard, and it got the vengeful God's attention locked onto him and he had decided to take out his numerous frustrations on him. Well, if that was the case, then why couldn't Hyne take it out on the one ultimately responsible for the end of Ultimecia? Squall was such a better target than he was, didn't Hyne realize that?

Why did it have to be him? Why? It wasn't fair! He couldn't help it if he liked hotdogs so much. Why did his childhood enemy, turned Sorceress' Pet, have to come back here of all places? And why did one of his so called friends, also known as Squall Leonhart, have to let him in? Life was so unfair.

And as soon as the elder blonde boy was in, he turned on Squall and began to call him 'Commander Puberty,' Squall frowned, but did not respond. Unfortunately Zell could never keep a hold of his temper the way the famous Commander of Balamb Garden could, and as soon as Seifer was done 'saying hello to the chickenwuss' as he put it, Zell launched himself at the smirking Seifer, going for an immediate stranglehold. Unfortunately, for Zell that is, Squall stepped in the way, and quite calmly held him back from ridding the world of Seifer Almasy.

It had only been a few days past that. A few days where Zell's elation turned slowly to horror and then anger, as Seifer did not stop picking on him and the others. But, aside from him, everyone else had figured out a way to deal with it. It was like nothing had changed between the two of them, like he and Seifer were still cadets and the entire Sorceress War a bad dream. But he would rather listen to that scary woman's cackle for the rest of eternity then be stuck in Garden with Seifer.

Irvine threatened to reveal some embarrassing memories of the orphanage to the entire Garden, once he had convinced Seifer that all of them had been in the Orphanage together.

Rinoa, well…no one in their right minds would make fun of Rinoa. Especially as the pretty dark haired girl now had the power to match with her temper…or she would just tell Squall. And Seifer still seemed to be slightly wary of her; due to some memory she sweetly mentioned but refused to elaborate on.

Quistis threatened him, wrapping her 'Save the Queen' around his neck and then offered to remove both of Seifer's heads, if necessary to ensure he would leave her alone.

Squall just ignored it. He had somehow learned not to let the older boy get to him. Zell sincerely wished he had Squall's patience level.

Selphie's way was the most amusing to watch. Whenever Seifer tried to make fun of her, she would laugh along with it. Seifer had quickly enacted a promise from the bubbly brunette. He would not pick on her as long as she didn't call him 'Seifie' in public. Some SeeDs were still having a chuckle at the nickname.

That only left him as Seifer's favourite target.

Zell frowned as he walked along, slowly heading to the out of the way meeting spot where his friends had agreed to gather. It was one of the rec-rooms near Squalls' dorm …which was rapidly becoming feminized as both Rinoa and Angelo moved in with him.

Why just the other day when Zell dropped by to visit / complain about Seifer, Squall kicked what appeared to be a lacy pink and purple pillow under the bed. Zell didn't care enough to enquire on what it really was. That reserve probably saved his life, as Squall glared at him darkly for even thinking about grinning. Squall's glare kept him quiet then, but he laughed himself silly out in the hall, and quickly told as many people as he could find that Squall liked lacy girl pillows.

Anything he could do to get revenge for the hell Squall was putting him through. Actually he was the one behind the spreading rumors of Squall's mishap with Rinoa in the incident now labeled 'Squall and Rinoa's Second Official Date.' Did Squall ever have a hellish week after that incident…with everyone smirking and smiling at him, or outright laughing in Selphie's case, whenever he happened to pass by. Thankfully the brunette boy had not guessed that Zell had been the one behind spreading the story to the entire Garden, especially Edea and Cid. He only wished he had come up with the idea to call Laguna and tell him.

Yet, what to do about Seifer, Zell mused as he entered the small dorm room. What he saw in there made him freeze. There, lying on a small couch, spread out like he didn't have a care in the world, was Seifer. His blonde head was resting on the back of the couch, with his limbs sprawled out, arms resting upwards on the upper sides of the couch, and his legs spread widely on the floor. Seifer snored unaware of the pain he was about to be in, Zell grinned. Despite the older blonde looking quite peaceful, he couldn't resist the opportunity that awaited him.

Right before him was the perfect solution, while it may not be something he wanted to do, it would definitely tell the older blonde that he wasn't happy about the teasing. Yet, to do that to another man, it was low…beyond low.

Taking a breath Zell crept up to his target, moving as quietly as possible to avoid waking Seifer. Thankfully the blonde freeloader was in a deep sleep, and only stirred slightly as he approached.

In matter of seconds Zell was standing before Seifer, watching patiently as the elder blonde slowly opened his eyes, doziness shining behind his dark green eyes as the two locked gazes for a moment.

In Zell's heart…he really didn't want to do it…

"Huh? Chickenwuss? Fuck off! You're ugly face's gonna give me nightmares."

Then there was no going back. Zell raised his foot and promptly kicked the drozy blonde in the not so nice spot.

Seifer's eyes bulged out of his head as what looked to be tears began to well up in his eyes. 'Riiiiiiight!!!' Zell thought. 'Junctions!!!!'

Seifer immediately clutched himself, falling out of the chair he had previously been sleeping in and slowly curled up in a ball, whimpering and cursing in several different languages under his breath.

"That's for teasing me!" Zell shot out, triumphantly.

"….Fuckin'…Shit….Fuck!!!!!" Seifer responded weakly, clutching the wounded area.

It was then that Zell's triumph began to fade. Seifer using whatever endurance he had slowly began to crawl over towards the corner of the room. Zell risked a glance over, and there in the corner was Seifer's gunblade, shining brightly in the summer light that struck it.

"'Kill you…Painfully…" Seifer promised as he crawled, cursing whenever the pain grew to be too much. "You…will…DIE!!!!" The blonde continued in a menacing tone, growing steadily darker at each word.

Zell shifted nervously, unsure if he really wanted to be there when Seifer recovered enough to either get up, or get a good grip on his gunblade. Either way, if he stayed it wasn't going to be pretty.

"What happened?" A female's voice echoed from behind him.

Zell whirled around, turning to face Squall and Rinoa. Rinoa was standing there with an openly puzzled expression on her face, while Squall tried to look stoic. Zell could barely see several emotions darting across his 'superior's flat eyes.

"Did you…?" Squall asked his voice carrying a strained hesitation.

Zell nodded slowly and Squall blinked, a faintly horrified expression beginning to grow.

"You were junctioned?" Squall asked and Zell nodded once more.

"Dead…." Seifer continued, steadily moving closer to his gunblade.

Zell could feel Squall sizing him up, before his steady grey eyes fell on the nearly prone Seifer, as he whimpered once more, a faint curse word echoing from his lips after another promise to 'horribly maim and then kill the chickenwuss.'

"Squall, is what happened, what I think happened?" Rinoa asked, a look of amusement beginning to appear in the girl's eyes.

Zell opened his mouth to explain, but Squall held up one hand, the other was tangled around Rinoa's waist. "Forget it, Zell! I don't want to know. Just run."

Zell didn't wait any longer, turning swiftly and racing back out of the hall, nearly trampling Squall and Rinoa as he passed. This was certainly turning out to be a bad day for him. Maybe he could talk Quistis into letting him hide in her closet for awhile, until the tall blonde's murderous intent died down.

Even if it only died down a little bit.


End file.
